Marisa Peer - How your beliefs can shape your reality

In the latest episode of Diary of a CEO, Steven Bartlett delves into a heart-to-heart with the eminent therapist Marisa Peer, founder of Rapid Transformational Therapy (RTT). With over three decades of experience, Peer's wisdom spans from personal mental wellbeing to understanding complex relationship dynamics. Here’s what we learned from their enlightening conversation:

The Mind’s Power

  • Choice and Questioning of Beliefs: Our beliefs are not set in stone. Marisa stressed the importance of continuously choosing and challenging them. If a belief doesn’t serve or empower us, why hold onto it?

  • Lie to Yourself, Constructively: This may sound counterintuitive. However, Marisa implies that positive affirmations can transform our mindset. Telling ourselves constructive 'lies' can sometimes lead to actual belief and positive change.

  • Reality Formation: Our mind is an incredible tool. Marisa pointed out that whatever we feed it with, it seeks to materialize. Essentially, your thoughts have the power to shape your reality.

  • Understanding the Mind’s Rules: By understanding how our minds work, we can tap into its full potential and guide it to work for our benefit.

Relationship Dynamics

  • Perception Over Reality: You might not have control over events, but you certainly can control your perception of them. Changing the narrative can change the emotional impact.

  • Self-definition: Marisa emphasized that how we define ourselves invariably dictates our actions.

  • Intimacy vs Eroticism: While intimacy thrives on familiarity and closeness, eroticism demands distance and mystery. Understanding this dichotomy can provide profound insights into maintaining a balanced relationship.

  • Rekindling the Spark: The thrill in relationships tends to wane over time. But the key lies in infusing novelty and maintaining a certain element of surprise.

  • The Silent Body Language: When words fail, the body speaks. It's essential to be attuned to our partner’s non-verbal cues, as they often convey what's left unsaid.

  • The Myth of Perfection: No individual can meet all our needs. It's crucial to differentiate between essential needs and unrealistic expectations.

Seeking and Nurturing Love

  • The Quest for Love: Being proactive in love is vital. Don't just wait for it to happen.

  • Wishlist for Love: Creating a list might sound mechanical, but it can provide clarity on what you seek in a partner.

  • You Are Deserving: Marisa passionately spoke about self-worth. Recognize and believe that you are worthy of love.

  • Radiate Self-worth: People can inherently sense your confidence and self-worth. Radiate it, and you'll attract the right kind of energy.

Closing Thoughts

Marisa Peer's insights, rooted in decades of therapeutic experience, offer a treasure trove of wisdom. Whether you're navigating the complex world of relationships or seeking to understand yourself better, taking these pointers to heart can guide you on a transformative journey.

Remember, as Marisa said, "What you learn is what you live." Make the choice to learn and live well.

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